LemmeLickThemJaeShins's profile : Batoto

Just your classic old lady in a safe, comfortable relationship that likes to read all the spiciest, most effed up shiz for the drama. That said, I feel slightly obligated to provide some resources for all of you youngins out there trying to figure out sex and relationships:

[This section is under construction, but feel free to dm me in the meantime to send resource links <3 Be safe y'all.]

First and foremost, please.. for the love of all that is holy.. do not use this site as a means to learn what good, safe sex looks like. There are occasional gems but, some important things consistently missed for one reason or another:

Anal sex takes A LOT of preparation, especially since BUTTHOLES DO NOT SELF LUBRICATE LIKE VAGINAS. OKAY?
- Water or silicone based lubricants are ideal for anal sex, as they won't break down toys or condoms. Here's a link to an excellent guide on lubricant choices in general.
- If you do not take time to relax, you can cause long term problems from tensing reactions when trying to go too big, too fast. Working your way up with something small is best, and here is a good resource talking about how to do so.
- A little blood in anal sex can happen, but steps should be taken to avoid it. Would you rub poop on a cut? No. So try not to rip up your poop tube, as it can lead to scary infections. See the above two bullet points for resources on avoiding this.
- Even with all precautions, small tears can make you far more prone to complications from unprotected sex. Please keep yourself safe with correctly fitted condoms (we don't want any circulation issues or condoms lost to the abyss). Here are some good places to look for those of you that may not be lucky enough to fit in the standard sizes.
- Never ever ever ever use a toy in your butt if it:
  -> Is not made of body-safe, non porous
  materials that can be effectively
  sanitized.
  -> Does not have a distinct flare at the
  end to keep you from experiencing an
  awful visit to the ER.
  -> Is much bigger than you are used to,
  until you have taken the steps to
  practice with smaller
  toys/fingers/dicks to work your way
  up.
- Douching can be weird, time consuming, and downright dangerous. Please be safe and careful. Most of the time, it is unnecessary if you have recently had a proper, solid bowel movement. Here are some good guides on safe anal douching practices.
Vaginas are weird man. They just are. They're finicky, kinda gross sometimes, and can be somewhat high maintenance. Some important highlights for vagina owners and their partners:
- Anatomy is important, but pretty frequently poorly addressed, if at all, when learning to be a human. Here's a helpful diagram.
- Vaginas are self cleaning. All of that weird gunk you sometimes get in your undies? Basically your vagina's version of a hairball. Here's some helpful info on vagina goo. DO NOT PUT SOAP UP INTO THE VAGINA. THIS CAN LEAD TO SERIOUS INFECTIONS. Some mild soap and warm water can be used to clean the labia and surrounding areas. If you are experiencing some odd odors, it may just be your vagina doing some housekeeping. I find that sleeping without undies and wearing more loose, breathable clothing with cotton undies goes a long way with clearing up mild imbalances. If you get a whiff from down there that smells like fish, yeast/bread, or toe cheese (it's as horrifying as it sounds, but more common than you think) please see a doctor immediately for diagnosis and treatment. Here are some helpful guides on vaginal hygiene.
- Urinary tract infections are incredibly common, and there are some basic prevention steps you can take. Since your butt and vagina are neighbors, bacteria can travel in all those sexy fluids and up the urethra. Yeah, gross. Some basic prevention:
  -> Pee before and after sex. One lubricates the urethra to minimize friction that helps bacteria travel up, and one helps flush out any small amount that may have started to work its way up. Even if it's just a drop, this is very important.
  -> Change out of wet underwear and swimsuits as soon as possible. All that fluid helps bacteria travel to places you don't want it to.
  -> Your public hair is a friction guard that helps with prevention on a similar way to peeing before sex. If you are having frequent issues, it can be helpful to try trimming the area rather than fully shaving or waxing.
  -> Choice of underwear is important. For workouts, something that wicks away sweat and dries fast is ideal. For day to day, something breathable and made of natural fibers, even if just in the gusset, is best. Be careful with thongs and tight undies for all of the reasons listed above.
  -> If you are in a long term, stable relationships and choose not to use condoms because, say, maybe you have a latex allergy and a gifted partner? (Here are some options for that.) Whatever your reason, your vagina may take some time to adjust to a new type of fluid injection, so to speak. Take your undies off when you sleep, hydrate, and wear breathable undies.
  -> If something seems off, ask your doctor. If they are weird about answering your questions or make you uncomfortable, go find a different doctor.
  -> I'm not going to attempt to cover birth control here, but here are good expert resources for reference.
CONSENT AND SAFETY WITH SEX IS SO SO SO IMPORTANT GUYS. Here are some general rules to live by to stay safe and avoid crossing a line with a partner:
- Consensual non-consent is a thing but BDSM in general is poorly represented on this site. Here are some good resources for navigating the spicier sides of sex in a safe manner.
- Anything other than an enthusiastic "yes" while fully sober is not consent. No means no. "Eh, I'm not sure" means no. Snoring means no.
- Consent can be taken back at any time. Stop when asked, and your partner should as well.
  The following excuses are absolutely not acceptable:
- "Blue balls", or serious pain and discomfort from having an erection and not getting to ejaculate does not actually happen unless there is some weird underlying medical condition that should be addressed.
- "I can't stop now that I've started." Yes they can. They can respect you, or they can leave.
- "Just one more time, please?" This crosses the line into coercion. If your partner is really just not into it, it's not time for sexy times.
- Any pushiness related to an obligation to perform sexual acts due to relationship status is unacceptable.

Anyone that consistently uses the above needs to change thier behavior, or they are not worth your time. You deserve to be respect and safety.

ALMOST NONE OF THE STORIES ON THIS SITE ARE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP EXAMPLE, EVEN WITH SOME OF THE GREEN FLAGS. Okay? Okay. If you are unsure of where you stand in a current relationship or think you may be getting into a bad situation, or even just want to be informed, here are some of my favorite resources for identifying safe, stable relationships:

If you are in a bad situation, here are some resources with steps you can take:

If you made it this far, consider me impressed. Be safe, have fun, and make good choices. 💙

Feel free to DM me with questions or suggestions I guess. Just know that I may not respond promptly and probably won't respond to trolls.

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